1 Month

It's been one month since my dad's accident. In some ways it has gotten easier and in other ways I just miss him more! He's missing out on so much. I know some tell me that he's not missing out and he's able to watch us all the time, but really those words are not comforting at this point and time. I want to be able to give him a hug again and I want to see his face light up when he sees Kailyn. I want him to see all the new things she's doing. I still feel like I should be able to pick up the phone and call him. In this past month I had one day in which I did not shed a tear, and then I felt guilty for that. I know he wants me to be happy and to go on with my life, but I hate thinking that he's no longer apart of my life. I know he'll always be apart of my life, but what I mean is I'll no longer have any new memories with him. For almost my entire life, my dad was the number one guy in my life. I would turn to him for everything! If my car was making a funny noise I'd call him and stick my phone out my window so he could hear what I was talking about. I would call him when I would get hurt or when I needed to smile. He was also the go to guy if I had questions about our house. He would do anything for me. It's not fair that he has been taken from us this soon. We had so many plans in the future. He was so excited to come down here this August with his new truck so he could haul the big boat out to the lake. Last year he had a smaller truck and it just looked so funny hauling the boat. He was also looking forward to attending any of Kailyn's future ball games, dance recitals, choir concerts, etc... He very rarely missed any of mine. My dad was the best dad ever and I miss him so very much!